What I remember most about high school was the feeling of not quite fitting in. I was popular and all and had many external successes, but as you know, our mind often creates an entirely different reality.

I spent a lot of energy trying to be like other people that I thought were cooler, better looking, smarter, funnier, had a better body…you fill in the blank.

It wasn’t until years later as I dove into personal development work that I found out many, many people experienced very similar things. Like me, tons of people lived (and are still living) through comparing themselves to others.

What’s the deal with that?

It’s fricken exhausting, isn’t it?

Why do we run from our own self-expression?

Many people have been doing it their entire lives.

At some level, many people would rather imitate others than just be who they are, as if somehow, the knock-off version of someone else is better than the original version of themselves.

From a business and marketing perspective, this is a slow death. It would be easy to say that this happens because we teach people to model successful people. We say to find someone that has what you want and model them.

Doing what successful people do is certainly a way to success, but unless you model successful habits while developing your authentic self-expression, it’s easy to lose yourself in the process.

Is success worth it if you are just a carbon copy of a bunch of other people?

I think this is one of the big reasons people fail in this world. They don’t trust themselves.

I can speak from personal experience that I have had many incredible ideas that I stuffed away for fear of whether they were good enough, only to act on them years later when I got the balls.

Waiting doesn’t work.

Filtering your ideas against what the rest of the world is doing only dilutes your value.

Vanilla is a pretty boring flavor.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
- Howard Thurman

Yes, come alive.  That is it.

When it comes to marketing, blogging, copyrighting and presenting your business…sure there are some fundamentals that you want to learn and put in place, but nothing and I mean nothing, can replace your spirit.

If all of your articles, posts and blogs read just like a hundred other people in your niche…why would anyone follow you?

Be fricken original.

We see this all the time online. People model others but forget to make their work their own. The result is bland, boring copy.

Don’t be that guy.

Find your sweet spot. Identify what really lights you up.

Then, focus on letting your own light shine instead of trying to borrow a tiny bit of someone else’s.

“There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost.”
- Martha Graham

So, my dear friends, it’s time to get jiggy with it. Go get your freak on! Your authentic, true to yourself, completely original, flava boiling over…self-expression.

Choose today, right now, to do ONE THING that celebrates your self-expression. Let the tiger (or tigress) out of the cage. We want to hear you roar.

It’s time the world sees what you (the one and only you) are really made of.

Please comment if you connected with this post and tweet/re-post to your heart’s desires.

Would you like to develop a friends list that actually wants to hear what you have to say?

Today’s technology driven world moves incredibly fast and the vast majority of people are on autopilot experiencing information overload.  We see friend and follower requests, we add them.  We scan RSS feeds, status updates and tweets.  It’s daunting to keep up but it’s all the more reason to make an effort to do so.

Here are a few simple practices that will leave you forever imprinted in an amazing light in the hearts and minds of your connections.

1. Take time to write a short note to new friends

Almost no one does this and less do it with consistency.  It shows care and interest and it shows (whether it’s true or not) that you have some interest in actually getting to know them.  Of course, it’s significantly better if you actually do.  Do you want to hit a grand slam?  Actually go and read their profile first and make a comment that is personal to them.  Whatever you do, be authentic in your communications, the social web can sniff out posers faster than Chris Brown can say “Anger Management.”

2. Provide Value First

I honestly can’t believe how many insta-pitches I still get.  Apparently someone must respond or people would just stop doing it, but I can’t imagine anyone actually does.  I have written about this before.  People, really, put some value INTO the world instead of just trying to take it out.  What do your connections find valuable?  Provide it for them.  Imagine walking into a restaurant for dinner and as soon as the hostess seats you, the waiter comes up and says, “That will $85 please.”  Ah, what?  Can I have my dinner first?

Yeah, it makes no sense, but people still do it.  Then they quit their businesses saying that social media and social networking don’t work.  It’s no different on the web than it is in the restaurant.  Value drives consumer interest and action.  Give people the food they really want first.  If you constantly over deliver, people will beat down your door to connect with you.

3. Make Comments

Yes, people want to know you care.  Are we starting to see a pattern?  Take a few moments and extend a part of your life into theirs.  The world of social media is a bit of a paradox.  It can be a very impersonal personal experience.  We are connected to people all over the planet, but if we aren’t conscious about forwarding our relationships, the connection can be lost.  Comment on their FB status & blog post, retweet their tweets or tweet their blog post.  If you find value in what they are saying, it’s likely your friends will too.  (HINT, HINT PEOPLE!)

4. Create Groups To Organize Interest

If you use your social networks for both business and personal use as most people do, use groups to gather who is interested in what you are saying.  If you are in Network Marketing create a value based group for your company or industry instead of constantly exposing your entire friend list to your offers.  I have friends that I get 6 and 7 invites to things a week.  Honestly, it’s a bit much.  After a while, it’s like the gynecologist after a long day at the office coming home to his wife and she is wearing sexy lingerie, “Honey, if I see one more…”

4.7 Be Consistent

If you are going to establish an online presence, then do it.  Really do it.  I understand time is an issue for everyone, but make a commitment and stick to it.  Don’t add 500 friends in a week, post a few articles and disappear for 3 months.  Stay in the game.  Post your articles in places that they will create value for the readers.  Post them often.  I recently attended a webinar where the guy was talking about his LinkedIn strategy for lead generation.  It was great.  He generated over 1,600 leads in 6 months for his affiliate programs mostly through article submission and some of the strategies above.  But guess how many times he published an article?  1944 to be exact.  That’s right, 1944.  Now THAT’s consistency and his business exploded because of it.

Get out of here now…go make some friends or go actually be a friend to some of the ones you already have.  But before you do, remember to leave your comments and if you found value in this post, retweet me please.