You are just bending the truth of who you are a little…it doesn’t matter, no one will know.

It really doesn’t fit with your values…but you should let it go, it doesn’t matter. No one will know.

But you know. You know clearly. Each and every time.

Being authentic is relatively simple in concept, but very rarely practiced consistently in today’s world. In many ways, I consider myself to be authentic, but I have come to understand that being authentic most of the time just doesn’t work. When is it okay to be inauthentic?

In other words, when is it okay to NOT be true to who you are?

I know, for me, fear, judgment, trust & acceptance all play a role and influenced many of my decisions over the years. Where do you let fear & judgment influence who you are being in your personal relationships? What about in your business relationships?

What prices are you paying for those choices? In other words, what is being inauthentic costing you in life? What are you missing out on?

In speaking with many others, being completely authentic is a bit like the Holy Grail; it’s often sought but very rarely found. Think about the number of COMPLETELY AUTHENTIC relationships you have in your life where you are free to talk about anything without concern of judgment or criticism.

I know I can count mine on one hand.

What exactly are we all so afraid of? In the transformational work I have done over the last 15 years with both youth and adults, it’s clear that we are all living out the same dramas – pretending to be things we are not, stuffing real emotions, biting our tongue, wearing masks, trying to impress, fighting for belonging and acceptance…

I don’t get it. I mean, I get why we do it all. I just don’t get why we do it all.

I have had the privilege of practicing being authentic in a few relationships over the last few months and this is what I have noticed. At first it scared the crap out of me. It was nausiatingly difficult. (I made that word up if you were wondering).

But then I noticed some other things too that for me, were really profound.

Authenticity alone doesn’t provide the juicy amazing feeling that I expected. It’s good; it’s self-gratifying, but still not complete.

Authenticity combined with unconditionality in a relationship is magical.

Apply this into your personal relationships and you’ll win every time.

Apply this into your business relationships and you’ll make a fortune…and love every step of the way.

To me, this is the “Galt’s Gulch” of personal relationships and everyone should have some. I think we cut ourselves off so much from the full experience of what it means to be human and this kind of relationship is an experience that everyone gets to have.

If you don’t have any…start now. Waiting isn’t worth it.

I am grateful for all of the times in my life that I chose to be inauthentic and for all of the people I have encountered who were inauthentic in their dealings with me.

It is because of those experiences that I am abundantly clear that I am no longer willing to pay the price of inauthenticity. It’s a nasty debt that accumulates over time.

I choose to be debt free.